I'm Baaack

Ok, folks. I've received SO many messages begging, pleading, imploring me to return to my blog.

And by SO many, I mean not even one, but I know that y'all have been missing me despite the lack of missives stating thus.

I could give you all sorts of excuses why I've been gone --- numerous doctors' appointments, days filled with gruesome depression and dread, semester finals, conference presentations, spending time with my cats --- but you don't want to be bored with a list, so I'll skip that part. #sarcasm #becauseIjustgaveyoualist

My point is: I'm back. And I have SO much to discuss.

First, and foremost, I want to discuss the ah-MAY-zing trend that is making Barbies more realistic to the female form. No, seriously, a toy company is actually releasing a Barbie-like doll that is to scale with the average female size based on data from the Center for Disease Control and Prevention.

I have decided that the world needs this. Therefore, I have contacted the toy company and suggested they make a Barbie realistic to my lifestyle. And they agreed! Here it is!!!

Obviously, the final product would have more cats, but one can't be too picky when being depicted in doll form. (For real, though, there is a new doll coming, and for those of you who are all about bringing down the hetero-normative patriarchy, you can read the article here.)

Remember that part where I said I had TONS to discuss? Welp, I was lying, because this blog post is juuuuust about to come to an end, with my last order of business being to leave you with a teaser about the next post: cemeteries. No, really, I'm going to blog about tombstones, and you're going to drool over it!