Announcing A New Family Addition...

Oh. Em. Gee. I'm tempted to ditch my citizenship. 

Don't get me wrong. Cheeseburgers! Apple Pie! Star Spangled! World Dominance! Obesity! And all that other 'Merica pride stuff!

But, know what other countries have on us?

THE BOXING DAY BUNNY!!!

I'm going to repeat myself, because I feel it's that phenomenal: Other magical places in the world have THE BOXING DAY BUNNY! And I want one.

Apparently, Aussies celebrate this long-eared being, and when I first heard of him, this is what I envisioned: 

Or, maybe this, which is a little less fairy-tale and a little more bunny bad-ass: 

THIS is what my husband, Mr. Big Moose, imagined, and I'm not so thrilled about it: 

Yeah, well, according to The Sidney Morning Herald, the Boxing Day Bunny is a little less Playboy and a lot more like, and I quote, "the guerilla of festive gift-givers, and you never know where and when he'll strike." 

I don't know if this bunny was bred by Che Guevara or is the Easter Bunny's second-cousin-twice-removed, but it's my new favorite obsession.

(Inserting relevant backstory here): Growing up, I didn't believe in Santa Claus. My parents never told me about him. Instead, all of my presents came from my parents. And that was absolutely A-OK by me. But then I got married, and my husband's eyes goggled when he talked about the glorious mystery of the fat man in the suit (although, I argue, my dad was on the heavy side, and he wore nice clothes to work, so I argue kinda the same thing). So, I never had that wizard-behind-the-curtain experience, and I think the Boxing Day Bunny can remedy this tragic situation. 

Apparently, this rabbit comes the day after Christmas and surprises sad little boys and girls and whiny adults who didn't receive what they wanted for the big holiday. But the Boxing Day Bunny isn't just some generous stuffed animal who is all about spending wads of Benjamins. He's more of a bargin-bin dude instead.

Now, to me, somebody only wanting to spend the bare minimum on people during the giving season sounds much more believable than a generous spirit willing to give up an entire night's sleep to give people expensive gifts. Or maybe that's just my family...

Since this blog is supposed to include some vintage and historical charm, I'm going to go ahead and give you a mind-enhancing quickie: 

This day-after-Christmas holiday is celebrated by most countries in the Commonwealth (the traditional English term for a political community founded for the common good, now used to refer to the former members of the British Empire), but it's celebrated in a what-are-we-celebrating-again? sort of amnesic state where nobody really knows (or really cares, for that matter) who, why, when, how, etc. it started. 

Some people think that the Christmas carol "Good King Wencelas" tells the origin of this holiday, when the Duke of Bohemia was struck by a socialist state of mind and delivered some food and wine to some poor starving, freezing dude.

Other people think that Boxing Day started when the Church of England began setting out a box (key word here being "box") and asking parishioners to drop in a coin or two throughout the Advent season. On the day after Christmas, the priests broke open the boxes, handed the money to the poor, thus leading to the name Boxing Day --- maybe. Not sure though. Because...

A fourth official theory exists as to why people round the world celebrate the 26th. Hoity-toity muckety-mucks like the Granthams used the day after Christmas as a time to distribute boxes of gifts to their servants and then "graciously" allowed the help to spend part of that day with their own families. How kind. 

All of these are true. Or none of them. Nobody knows. What historians agree on for sure is that people gave servants presents, but few of us have an Upstairs/Downstairs arrangement (and shame on you if you do!), and they confirm that the church gave the poor charitable donations, but religion is on the decline and the last time I met a generous person was when I looked in the mirror and told myself that what I saw didn't look all that bad. My personal theory is that the holiday started when some bitch like me was all like, "I have a list of people I want to punch in the face. Yeah. I'm going to get on that. And extra kudos to me if I make a holiday of this!" 

Nowadays Boxing Day is known for being a British Empire holiday where a) people go to pubs and watch soccer, b) go fox-hunting, or c) heading out for Boxing Day sales.

No, seriously, Boxing Day is to Britain as Black Friday is to America: mayhem and materialism. And it's been going on for awhile. I actually found this picture from the mid-century from Boxing Day:

Oooops. Totally wrong pic. THIS is the one I meant to post:

For real, people outside America go CRAY-CRAY over Boxing Day sales, and parents/friends/lovedones/family/strangers(scratch that last one) snap up sales and give them as the Boxing Day Bunny. Honestly, given the lethargy, laziness, and greed of Americans, I'm shocked we haven't yet adopted this holiday.

For realz, I NEED the Boxing Day Bunny in my life. This year for Christmas, I got family time and a pedicure. Only one was relaxing. I'll leave you to guess which one.

But if I could only get one thing from the Boxing Day Bunny, it'd be a Boxing Day Kitty...

... which, actually, I'm GOING TO GET, sans Muhammad Ali-vibe.

As some of you know, my husband and I lost our kitty, Mac, in early November. Today, Mr. Big Moose told me that we're going to start the New Year with a new kitten! We're already arguing about names. He wants to name the kitten Mr. Biscuits, and I want to name it Princess Pretty Pants, under the advisement of my niece. (We're taking name suggestions in the comment section, and we'll seriously consider glorious entries.)

So, yeah, the point of this whole long, rambling post is this: The Boxing Day Bunny brought me a coupon for a Boxing Day Kitty, and for this reason, I'm saying this: BRING ON THE BOXING DAY BUNNY TRADITION!!!